Esther

My body type is the kind that’s normally glorified in western media, so most people might not see it as an issue. However growing up in a Nigerian community, I’ve always been seen as unhealthy or sickly. I grew up hearing words like “You have no meat on your bones”, “pencil legs”, “bonger fish”, ”walking skeleton”, the worst is when someone sees the size of my wrists, says something like “oh my God you’re so tiny” and goes on to wrap their hand around my wrist. That right there is what gets me pissed off the most.

I mean If I had a bitcoin for every comment I hear about my weight, I’d be rolling with the Waltons or the Gates. Every family function I went to my mom would dissuade me from wearing tight clothes because I Would look like “a stick wrapped in cloth” and she didn’t want to have to deal with all of the questions and comments about my weight. Every time my aunt would say “are you even eating!? You’re so skinny you could fall over!”, I would just politely laugh it off and smile but in my head, I would say “trust me I can eat 5x more than you do and still wouldn’t gain a pound”.

While being skinny always has been and probably (unfortunately) will be a celebrated body type, there’s no denying that in 2019-2020, the body trend is being slim-thick. And so my insecurities got worse when I would hear things like “men want meat on their bones”. Now it’s all about having a huge butt and boobs with virtually no waist. My google search had lots to do with weight gain, I even thought of medications to take. Last year, through a process of re-awakening with God, I’ve come to love my body and treat it with more kindness, I eat and work out from a place of self-love and not self-deprecation. 

My health goal is to hit the gym to feel healthy, not just to mould my body into a certain physique. I want to eat good food, not to gain weight, but to treat my body like the home it is.

My name is Star. I’m a masterpiece. God’s own work of art, I have the je ne sais quoi. I am beautiful